I went to a friend's house this past Sunday and we had a lovely time. Good food, wonderful people and desserts to die for....seriously! I'm talking home made cookies of many varieties, but there's one and only one kind that I can't even get out of my mind!!!....and that's Aunt Paula's Macaroons...PEOPLE!!! If you like coconut, you'd think you literally died and gone to heaven! I tried to find a pic that was comparable to Aunt Paula's, but these still don't do them justice. Paula's macaroons are moist and sweet and chewy, with that pretty little cherry peeking out from it's valley right in the center of all that coconut goodness!! I know, I know....I get carried away when I talk about them, sorry.*clears throat* ....Anyway, I mentioned to my friends that when I got to my goal weight, I'd want these cookies. Then tonight while I was getting the family's dinner of pasta and mozzerella cheese heated up, (Yes, I was still thinking about these damn cookies) I thought of sitting there and eating a whole bunch of them, then I thought to myself, nah, why would I do THAT??
Ok, Maybe I could just have 2 or 3 of them
...then I thought
...nah, just one would be good.
Thinking about this made me realize, that I will never truly be able to gorge myself on anything again, not even Paula's macaroons!!!
I wouldn't want to. The thought of it was incomprehensible!
It would be breaking my commitment to myself to be whole and not settle for anything less than to live as I am capable of living...and that's free of any worry about excess fat and stress on my limbs and back. To be what I need to be for me. This is a change that has already taken place. It's not going to happen by magic when I reach a goal weight....it's already happened! I know I've written about having control before, but I am really ready for the long haul....I'm still motivated, still feeling great without even trying.
This life change absolutely IS a lifetime of change! Thinking thin, the mind working together with the body to make me more healthy has already happened. But it has to continue to happen for as long as I live and breathe, I will never be unhealthy again.
And someday, I will have 1 macaroon and maybe one of my mom's chocolate crinklies, but rest assured, I will not let myself be ruled by food.
Nothing tastes as good as being thin feels. :)
Nanette, you are really getting great at this BLOGGING thing. This is a great blog, and so right on. You are absolutely right, the days of binge eating are over. Even when we will re-join the carb world, it will never be like it was. I feel that as sure as I breathe.
ReplyDeleteNanette, you are special person and you will win the battle. I am going to create a special macaroon that you can enjoy. Keep up the good work. Paula
ReplyDeleteThanks, Don...glad you enjoy the blogs. Most of the time I haven't a clue what to say until I begin typing, then I can't stop! ;)
ReplyDeletePaula, Thank you sooooo much for stopping by and leaving a comment. A "special" macaroon?....Girl, I would more than enjoy it!! And we will win this battle, victory is ours...and it's going to taste so good!