$Hi!

Three lbs in four weeks. I am now tempted to begin stuffing my face with chocolate!!! Four weeks!!! Have you read my daily meals????
This makes NO SENSE!

I've not deviated once, I never eat anything I am not supposed to, my pants are fitting better and my sizes have gone down, yet I only lost a pound and some change!!! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

A philosophy we can all live by...

I heard this this morning and I love it so much. We all need to adopt this philosophy:

Yesterday is history, tomorrow a mystery.. but today.. is a gift.

It is so easy to get caught up in the day to day processes of our lives, that we fail to see the bigger picture.

'Yesterday is history'...

We can't change the past, so there is no sense in living there! I know that I have let my past experiences dictate how I act in the present, but not anymore.

'Tomorrow a mystery'...

We never know what will happen tomorrow, but as we are living a life that is moving into the future, we need to consider the future, and realize how what we do in the present effects it.

'Today is a gift'...

Time for us to open our eyes, see what is going on around us in the moment. Breath deep and soak in life, not just busily rush through it into the future! Not to be depressing, but, we never know when our last 'moment' will be. Live without regret and with purpose.

Maybe it's the lack of carbohydrates, but I feel my life is more focused, more true to what I want my future to be. This is my life philosophy. Thank you all for being a part of my life.

Another lazy.. summer day

Nothing in particular to blog about today, except all is well and on plan. I wanted to go exercise today, but Ed and I got busy with stuff around the house and I didn't have time. I will go tomorrow! This will still keep me in the '4 days' a week commitment. I felt good that I was actually a bit 'upset' that I didn't get to go.

We spent the day re-doing our living room. We got a new TV (OMG 55 inch LED TV .. the darn thing is only 1 1/2 inches thick and the HD picture looks so real when you are watching HD content that it seems like you are looking through a window at the actors.... oh, crap.. um... sorry... electronic geek sneaking out of me for a moment). Anyhow we had to put a stand together, move all of our electronic components and the previous cabinet out, so, in a sense, I did get some exercise!

I asked Sunny if she minded me weighing in a day early, because I like to have time to blog about it afterwards so I like to do it on a weekend if possible, so, I will be weighing in tomorrow (Sunday) instead of 1 June.

Good night everyone!

I Don't Know Why....

....but I was so sick yesterday, no amount of the pink stuff could make me feel better!
I have the same thing to eat basically every morning, so I'm not sure what caused it, but all of a sudden, I was dizzy, weak and so sick to my stomach, I could barely breathe!

I'm still not 100% and feel a little weak from expending everything within me (one way or another)..........YUCK! And I couldn't eat today until dinner because I was still full from finally eating something at 10 o'clock last night! Chicken wings weren't the best choice to make, but it's what I had available. But hey, I'm in my size 16 capri's today :-D and I am one very happy woman because of it! It's not easy feeling like I should be thinner than I am, (I know Don feels this too) but I know we're getting where we want to be and that's all that matters to us. We're not giving up, not giving in to temptation and this journey will see us both succeed!! Here's to a healthy, happy us!!!

For the long haul...

Today was another great day. I missed breakfast, which I need to take more care about. I went right into meetings at 7:00am and didn't emerge until almost noon.

I thought a lot today about what Sunny and I are doing. I feel good about how we have both progressed, but really, right now, it's hitting me. Regardless of how we are doing, we have to be in this for 'the long haul'. The amount of weight I have to loose will take a while. I started this at 465 and I want to get down to 210... that is loosing more (MORE) than half of myself.

I can hardly wait to experience what life will be like then, when I reach my final goal. I realize, to keep myself from becoming overwhelmed by the amount of weight I have to loose, I have to set interim goals. I have to celebrate reaching each of these. My first interim goal was to be able to weigh myself on a regular scale, and I have reached that. My next goal is when I transition from 400's to 300's, and I see that goal right around the corner.

So, I am happy, I am focused, I am realistic, I am healthier.... and I am out! Night all!

I really tried.. really.. .to STOP MYSELF... but ....

I did, i tried to stop myself, but I just couldn't help it. I was so tired, such a long day with working and then going to the gym... I was so worn down.. and .. well... I... I... I tried to not blog, but I just couldn't stop myself.

Really, I am so tired, and for the last half hour or so I was thinking, should I turn on the computer, or not... then this funny (all be it misleading) blog title popped into my head, and I couldn't pass it up! So.. a dedicated low-carber I am, but also a dedicated blogger...

Great day on plan and with exercise.. successful! YES! A friend at the gym was telling me his wife does hypnosis to help people (quit smoking, dieting, etc..) and he said, they have to really want to change, his wife would ask the client .. on a scale of 1 to 10, how much do you want to change. For the hypnosis to work, in her opinion, they needed to be at least a 5 or 6. I told him.. well, I'm about 3 months in now and I'd say I'm about an 11.. :) That's how I feel!

Good night all!~

A Heart to Heart

I've been thinking about our hearts a lot today. The heart is a vital organ of course, but in the spiritual sense, it's much more than that. We've all heard, "from the bottom of my heart" or "I love you with all my heart" and "heartfelt thanks"... it's the force of life, the center of it all. I mean, no one says...I love you with all my liver! The heart is constantly pumping life with blood to all the rest of our organs, our bodies and it's because of this fact that we exercise it, we make it stronger by using it.

Well, it's been my recent experience that when we love with our hearts, and we give all we can...I believe our hearts become stronger, like a sort of spiritual workout. To love with all our hearts, to give with it....being generous with our time or showing someone a little extra care, not only makes our hearts flourish but it can be catchy too! I've seen this, and if you pay attention, you will as well.

Well, here's the tie-in with the whole weight issue.....When we're feeling joy from giving to others, being kind, caring for someone, smiling instead of frowning all the time, it makes us FEEL better.

When we feel better about ourselves, we are more confident and less likely to overeat. But we have to feel the joy that comes from exercising the heart in a spiritual way.

I am learning to feel more, is what I'm saying. I am using my empathy skills more, I am cultivating my spirit and it is having a direct affect on how I treat my body. I am respecting it by giving it what it needs instead of stuffing feelings down and stuffing my face up. I used to live well and do the right thing, tried my best to be a good person and exercised my heart, without even thinking of how good it could actually make me feel, if I let it!

Fat and jolly is for Santa, folks! Have you ever really met a person who's lost a lot of weight and they say they were happier as a fat person? I haven't! I am learning that being a kind, caring, giving person and paying attention to how it makes me feel....is helping me to stay the course!

I truly hope this makes some sense to someone other than myself :)

Cool Day.. Sunny thoughts.

I've had a great day, stayed on plan all day and have been feeling much more energetic and mobile. I had several people at work today comment on how much weight I have lost and how happy they are for me. It felt wonderful to get some validation in that way.

My thoughts, however, have been on Sunny Girl and what she is enduring right now. She is being brave, focused, and just downright unbelievably dedicated and on track, even with all the pressure and break from her normal routine. I have to giver her so much credit. Everyone send her much love and energy as she perceivers her ordeal. Sunny, you Inspire ME!

Sunny, we all are proud of you, love and support you.

Tuesday's Blog

I am so happy to know that you are at peace, Don. I wish I could blog, I just can't think of much to say right now, maybe tomorrow. I am on track and I can't wait to weigh again.

My dad is worse every day though and I am depressed beyond anything I've felt in a long time. I like your lists and I'm thinking of you.

Peaceful... easy feeling

Today I feel at peace with myself and my new way of life. I had a very busy day at work, in meetings the entire day. I went to the gym directly from work and worked out for an hour and a half. It was a very good day. I feel great.

Things I am looking forward to:

Tying my shoes

Buying cloths at a normal store

Walking with ease

Bending over with out worrying about falling down

Things I am grateful for:

Every breath I take

Every step I take

Every day I live

All the love I give

Fat men DO BOUNCE...

I forgot to talk about this in my last blog...

When I was at the gym today I took quite a tumble in the locker room. I was changing into my bathing suit and had my 'crocks' on my feet. I stepped over the bench next to the locker (which was way to close to the lockers) and my crock got snagged on the bench. Of course, Newton's first law of motion being what it is, once I was in motion.. there was no stopping me.

To my left at another locker was a very old man, facing me. He saw me going down and screamed. I think that scared me more than the fall itself. Having the military training I do, I learned how to drop and roll (in this case drop, bounce and roll), and what could have been a pretty bad fall, ended up only straining the thumb on my left hand.

The old man, on the other hand, was quite shaken, and told me 'Don't you ever do that again'! I didn't even know how to reply to that, so I said, 'it's ok, I'm not hurt'!~ Anyhow, I discovered that at my age, I can still bounce!

No Boundaries ...

... those of you who watch American Idol know that this is the finale song which Kris Allen sang when he won the show. It's a great song, Google the lyrics if you want, they're fantastic and inspirational. Today, this is how I feel... no Boundaries.

I was listening to the song (and others) while I worked out today and thought, that's what I should blog about today. I really feel that I have removed all the obstacles which have kept me from successfully loosing weight in the past. I am moving forward and heading in the right direction. There is nothing blocking my way and nothing I can not do.

I'm glad I decided to start including exercise in my plan, it really makes me feel wonderful. Today I went to the gym for 2 hours and worked in the yard for an hour... what a workout! I'm sad that the long weekend is coming to an end, but .. hey... reality has to rush back in at some point.

I am going to prepare tonight so I can go from work to the gym tomorrow night. I'll see how it works out, so I can figure out what to expect when I want to workout during the week.

Remember... NO BOUNDARIES... the best way to live!

An Update

On my way to the hospital to check on my dad. He was doing much better yesterday and even Friday...the rehydration has done wonders for his mind. He seemed more aware and was eating and drinking. His kidneys are still not working properly and the doctors doubt that will again so, the situation is still dire...it's just good to be able to talk with him.

It's not the memorial weekend we all had in mind, but as long as we're together, it's all good. So my day will be spent with my family and my mom and dad. I'll probably bring my mom back here for a little bar-b-que, I don't want her to spend it alone. I'm so glad I can be there for her at a time like this. I will remain on plan and true to myself and our journey, as I have in the past. The stress of it all will not beat me. I won't be brought down and I WILL be successful in the end!
Happy Holiday weekend to all!!!

Sore.. but GREAT

Good Morning all.

I thought I'd post early as we are going to drive to Cape May today to spend Memorial Day with our family.

I feel really great today, sore (shoulders and hip sockets), but GREAT. I am so glad I finally took down the last hurtle to my success, and committed to exercise.

I love spending time with family. Usually, the time is 'pig-out' time, there always being lots of great food and deserts. Today for me it will be a 'non-pig-out-zone' affair. I will resist all temptations, and stay focused. I know there will be good proteins available, salad and strawberries, so, that's all I need! I brought my drinking container and lots of single crystal light packets so I can drink and pee like crazy (I hope my skin is benefiting from all the water!!).

The lesson for today is, family get togethers are for eating and drinking in the atmosphere, the relationships and the bonds.. not every thing eatable in sight!

Everyone have a great Memorial Day weekend!

Slow, but steady... wins the race..

I think the cartoon pretty much sums it up...

Hi all. I love long weekends!~

Today is THE DAY.. a MOMENTOUS DAY... It's the day that I publicly commit, finally, to now include exercise in this new path that I am on. I hesitated at the beginning because I have problems with my hips, knees and ankles. BUT... I am just going to start slow, and increase increments and time as my body will allow.

SO... I feel great.. it's like how I felt when I decided to start this, and how I felt when I saw I was succeeding. This, for me, is really the last hurdle. I have 'been released' from the recliner weeks ago and have been more active, but committing to exercising is THE step, THE FINAL STEP, that is going to bring all of this together. The weight will 'melt like butta'. Exercise is essential!

So here is my commitment. I will accomplish some sort of exercise, at the beginning of this, at least 4 days a week. I am starting with walking around the track and swimming / stretching in the pool at my gym. Then a good steam in the steam room to reward and sooth my body!

This morning I went out with Ed and got all the stuff I needed, a gym bag, a couple of swim suites, a lock, some 'BIG BOY' towels, and other essentials. Then I came home, packed my bag and headed for 'Balleys Total Fitness' at the Oxford Valley Mall. I've had a membership there for almost 20 years now (since 1990). I put on my iPod shuffle, put on my DISCO MIX and was able to walk around the track at a good pace for 15 minutes before I had to stop. Then I changed, got in the pool and exercised in there for 30 minutes, doing laps , running in place and stretching. After all that I went into the steam room. I was at the gym a total of 2 hours, and I FEEL GREAT.. TIRED, yes, but GREAT!

I will go again on Monday. I will gradually increase the time around the track and in the pool.

As soon as I can do continuous laps in the pool, I'll start logging them. I plan to log my exercise with my meals on the 'Meals Page'.

So, all in all.. Great Day! Great choices, and another LIFE CHANGE!

I Have Arrived...

Yesterday, Don mentioned that I have a very stressful time ahead, and while this is true...I am not having trouble coping or feeling depressed to the point of turning to food for comfort.

My father was recently sent to a hospice from the emergency room where my brother and mom had to send him when he was found to be having a serious health issue. His health took a turn for the worse due to dehydration problems which effected his kidney function. And due to his age (90) and the fact that my mom can no longer care for him, it was suggested that he be put there by his doctor. Of course this caused much stress and confusion as to when and how my mom can get to see him, (she can't drive just yet, because she's had surgery on her foot) will he be alone too much of the time...etc. All legitimate concerns, but none too much to handle.

My brother and I simply put our heads together and decided just to be there whenever we can...and sometimes when we can't. It is just easier for me to deal with all of this stress now as opposed to before this journey, and I believe that is due to this new confidence level I've developed. I'm sure it comes with age, but I am also sure that I am thinking clearer, feeling as light as a butterfly most of the time, energetic beyond anything I've ever felt and more in control of my actions and decisions than I have ever been as well.

I haven't turned to foods that will not help me on this journey to make me feel less stressed, because I am finally helping myself instead of hindering myself. I am not about to undo all that I've done because something will taste good or feel good going down. Or overeating to fill a void or to feel some temporary comfort.

It's not what life is for me anymore. The solace I find now, comes from the fact that I am living a better life. I am not afraid to go out anymore, I am not lazy or procrastinating, I am a whole new me...these things are priceless to me. And that which has a price to pay, is not the way I choose to go. I paid long enough!!

Making good choices even in distress, tells me I am here. Not that I am going to be there someday, but that I've actually arrived!!

Thanks Don, for keeping it going and continuing to be an inspiration!

Paving the way...

... I've been thinking today a lot about paving the way.. For instance, last weekend I ordered these new 'Green' pans from HSN, to give me good tools to cook my meals (I had one pan that I love, so I ordered several more pieces).

Today I am really beginning to start to put together a plan for exercise (there, I said it.. I'm finally ready to start to commit to some consistent exercise.. Stay tuned for more details to come).. but anyhow, to pave the way for this, I downloaded 150 'disco' era tunes from iTunes to put on my Nano. I'll be inspired by the upbeat music as I walk around the track at the gym.

I think it's important to give good thought and preparation to the major steps along our path, not just follow some 'yellow brick road' blindly. I believe good planning has gotten Sunny and I this far, and now it's time to pick-up the pace a bit, and plan some more! I'm excited.

Also, today we had a great day, not only plan wise, but fun wise as well. Ed and I went out on our motorcycles and rode to Peddlers Village (in Lahaska PA), had a nice lunch out, walked around and just had a relaxing, rejuvenating day!

Things I'm grateful for today: (in no particular order)

Motorcycles

Warm Days

Pants that fall down

Butts that fit more comfortably in chairs (normal chairs)

My loving, supportive husband

Strength for a friend

I had a good day today, on plan with no slip-ups. All day I've been feeling 'kind-a-fat', which I know is something I just have to 'get over'. I am still heavy, and will be for quite a while, but I'm progressing in the right direction. No matter how 'positive' I feel about my changes, occasionally those things that I miss, that I have loved for so long in my life, creep in and try to mess with my mind. I am dedicated to keeping focused, though, and not letting those things (foods) knock me off track, because I AM IN CONTROL!

Having said that, I want the rest of this blog to be dedicated to supporting Sunny Girl. She is going through a family emergency right now that, I am sure, is putting an enormous amount of stress on her. I think it's probably the first time she is really being 'tested' to handle stress without resorting to old eating habits. Sunny, we love you, are praying for you.. and know you can handle anything. Look what you have accomplished, how much your life has changed because of your decisions. Stay focused, through the stressful time. I know you can do it!~

Incredible Day....Incredible Future!

What an incredible day!!! I spent it being busy at home, but it was no less stupendous than it would have been, had I spent it outside. I feel so good, I feel alive and free of the restrictions that 30 plus pounds will put on you, I feel excited for every new day, I wake up knowing I don't have to be unhealthy anymore and that's such a wonderful thing. When I walk down the steps in the morning, my knees don't ache!!!! I was actually going down sideways a couple of months ago :( I'm making plans and living them, actually doing what's on my agenda, I was such a procrastinator before I got serious about changing my life, but that's all behind me.

I am on my way out tomorrow, and I love the fact that I am so much more confident now, I don't feel like I need to wear layers of clothing so no one will notice the extra 100 lbs. hahaha!! Ridiculous I know, but that's how it was! I move and breathe with ease and my ankle is even feeling a little better. When I look at my hands, they don't even look like mine :) !! Yes, changing our lives has been amazing, we're on our way to our goals!

Reading Don's blog was so good for me tonight, I am even more energized mentally! We always seem to pick up on what each other is feeling on a given day, it's quite amazing actually, and I couldn't agree more, I too chose to live (instead of existing until extinction) by putting the emphasis on the people around me instead of the food! I don't even think about it anymore, I cook for the family and nothing I used to love even phases me anymore. I go to dinner and make all the right choices. I'm truly free. WE'RE truly free!

And may I say, I am so happy to have these new followers reading along and sharing in our journey, it makes it all the more exciting to know that people are pulling for us, people who appreciate what we're doing and why. Thanks, folks...we both really appreciate you right back!!!

I think.. therefore I am....

I had another good (and busy day today). I was talking to another co-worker today, someone who just started. She saw some pictures of me in a calendar in my workspace which Ed made for me and gave to me for Christmas last year. She asked... Who's that with Ed? WOW... who is that indeed. It's sure not me.. ANYMORE!

Peggy mentioned in her blog comment to me that she was astounded at the 180 degree turn-around she has seen in my attitude about food. She's absolutely right.. you see, she and I have been on cruises together, where the food abounds (as do the appetites) and has seen me go through 3 plates of food in a seating. The transformation took place for me ON THIS BLOG.. as I slowly resolved that my past behaviors and attitudes got me to where I am, and I realized if I want to continue living, I have to make a change. Once that 'clicked' in my mind, I had no choice but to change my perspective. I tried to constantly think about why I am doing this, what the benefits will be, how much happier I will be and how much easier my life will be.

I am a firm believer in the power of positive thinking.. and along those lines, I have adopted the attitude, I THINK, THEREFORE I AM~